Last night I once again tried to deep meditate, radio was on and she was reading. Cleared my mind waiting for an image or vision and then the standard happened, knee jumped, and the offshoot of this was that I ended up with chronic Arthritic pain in my knee and nothing got rid of it, Pills, heat my TENS unit, cream, nothing.
When I went to bed I said my Prayer to Danu and when I laid down I asked Danu to take the pain away and Caer to give me a good solid sleep. This was about 1.30 in the morning. Within about half an hour it was 12.30 Sunday afternoon, and I do not remember a thing. The Pain was still there but lessened considerably.
But what I do not understand is this
When I meditate I can sometimes visualise an image which is generally out of focus, but I can not interact with the image and I can not do Active Imagery. I even borrowed a healing (Fairy) cd from a friend who runs a New-age shop. When I tried to do the meditation all I got was very out of focus and as if they were drawn by a young child using crayons and they moved very jerky.
Most Teachers talk of Visualising an Orb of green, gold, or whatever colour, and one exercise which Amber Wolfe, in her book Shadow of the Shaman (pg 142) about finding a special cave and using your Power Animal (in my case Kaskai) to aid you, now this would be cool, very cool. If I could do more than see a blurry Image of Kaskai’s face like Her whole being or at least the cave. Or even drawing a circle using imagery, but I can not. These are just 3 examples of what I can not do.
What the hell am I doing wrong? This is really pissing me off. Within dreams, when I have Visions I can interact with them, but I get these Visions from my Gods so I do not really want to change them to much in-case the meaning is corrupted. Why can I not do visions (active Imagery) while awake. Any Ideas or Help will be gratefully received. I am also drinking one cup of fresh Rosemary tea each day, which is supposed to aid Physic ability and help clear the mind fog. Visual Imagery is an inherent part of the human Physic and yet mine is blocked.
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